There are three charts I want to present, which may at first glance seem to be unrelated.   But trust me, there is a connection.

First is the well known 'Hockey Stick' graph produced by the Climate Change Theorists who believe that the earth's climate is going through

a period of rapid change.

As you can see, the mean temperature of the world appears to be rapidly rising out of control.  

This has been correlated by some, using impossible to verify hypothesis, to the influence of man-made activity.  The chief culprit is thought

to be the levels of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere.   However, since atmospheric carbon dioxide at worst comprises a mere 0.039% of the total volume.

To put this in perspective, think of the atmosphere as a 100 yard football field.  The atmosphere is made up of Nitrogen, Oxygen, Miscellaneous Gases and Water Vapor, Argon, and Carbon Dioxide.    

So let's line up the components of the atmosphere in order of size along the length of the football field.  nitrogen will get you from the home goal line all the way to 22 yards from the visitors goal line.   We are already almost there.  Next is Oxygen.  Oxygen brings us just inside the 1 yard line.  Just think, between Nitrogen and Oxygen, we have accounted for over 99% of the atmosphere.

Next is the miscellaneous category which includes tiny bits of numerous gases and water vapor.  Out of the final yard of the football field that eats up another 31.8 inches.   We now have less than three inches left of the football field.   This tiny bit is equally split up between argon and carbon dioxide with 1.4 inches each.    It's hard for me to understand how 1 1/2 inches of carbon dioxide out of 100 yards would have much of an impact on the temperature one way or another.  At best, you can only come up with a correlation.  But there are OTHER correlations, assuming you trust the temperature readings of the last 130 years.

Next chart:  Baseball Salaries.

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I'm rather proud of this chart that I produced from data provided by Major League Baseball historians.

As you can see, baseball salaries in the 1960's were pretty stable, up through the mid 1970's, but they have become increasingly huge in the last 30 years.

Finally, one more chart.........

Now, this chart is scary as well.   All three charts reflect a hockey stick type shape, showing that things appear to be going wildly out of control, and in theory something MUST be done to put things right.     The first two charts have overlapping time periods, but the third chart picks up where the first two charts left off as far as time periods go.   Therefore, we can safely conclude that there is NO correlation to be seen between the disastrous government spending and climate change or baseball salaries.

Now, the baseball salaries chart represents the years of 1965 through 2002 only, so years prior to that should be excluded from comparison.  But even when you compare the portions of those first two charts that cover the same years, you can see an alarming trend.    It is incontrovertible that there is a clear relationship between average baseball salaries and global temperatures.

What do I propose?  Do I think we should ignore this evidence and stick our heads in the sand?  No!    I propose that we find a way to decrease average baseball salaries to test the theory that global warming is caused by extravagant baseball salaries.   It may not have much of an impact, but it is worth the sacrifice and effort to at least try.

I rest my case.

PS -  The members of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster have reported that there is an inverse correlation between climate change between the years 1880 and the present when compared to the number of pirates at large.   Basically, as the pirate population has decreased, the global mean temperature has increased.    They suggest that more pirates are needed in order to restrain the earth's burgeoning temperature.

This is claptrap.   The proof is in the fact that Somalia has dutifully been providing pirates in record numbers during the past 10 years or so, with absolutely no relief in global temperatures.  Nice try Me Hearties!

The Church of the FSM, unlike me, do NOT have science on their side.